Misunderstandings

“They understood not…” —John 8:27

A woman was waiting at an airport to board her plane.  She went to a vending machine and bought a small package of cookies. Then she sat down and began reading a newspaper. Soon, she became aware of a rustling noise. From behind her paper she was surprised to see a neatly dressed man helping himself to the package of cookies. Not wanting to make a scene, she leaned over and took a cookie herself.

A minute or two passed, and then came more rustling. He was helping himself to another cookie. By this time, they had come to the end of the package. She was so angry, she didn’t dare allow herself to say anything. Then, as if to add insult to injury, the man broke the last cookie in two and pushed half across to her, and ate the other half then left.

Still fuming some time later when her flight was announced, the woman opened her handbag to get her ticket. To her amazement and embarrassment, there was her unopened package of cookies!

Wrong assumptions lead to many of our misunderstandings.   After 40 years of pastoral counseling I’ve come to the conclusion that many conflicts are the result of misunderstandings. Misunderstandings break relationships and cause needless hurts.

David’s older brother Eliab misunderstood David’s presence at the battle with the Philistines (1 Sam. 17:17-18, 28).  David’s offer of condolences and kindness to Hanun was misunderstood as a prelude to war (2 Sam. 10:1-5).

In Joshua 22:11-34 the tribes of Gad, Reuben, and Manasseh settled on the east side of the Jordan.  They built an altar on the banks of the river. The tribes on the west side assumed they were rebelling against God and starting their own religion.   Before beginning an all out civil war, Phineas led a delegation to learn the truth—to get the other side of the story. He found out the altar was a memorial to the Lord, not an altar of heathen sacrifice. War was averted and unity restored.

Beware of jumping to conclusions without knowing ALL the facts and both sides of a story (Prov. 18:13).  Try to give a person the benefit of the doubt.

What should you do when your intentions are misunderstood?  It is best to leave the matter with God who knows the truth and your real motives (1 Pet. 2:23).